There are certain days I feel crappy and unattractive, be it due to stress, worries, or the monthly visitor fucking up with my hormones a week before the dreaded flow.
During these days, I often find myself staring at the mirror, beating myself up, and feeling disgusted with the person staring back at me. We all have those days, and finding reasons to love ourselves more dearly in those low moments can get quite tricky. It’s just really an accepted fact—there really are days when we don’t feel beautiful and sexy.
This feeling can get quite unbearable when you’re a plus-size person who went through life feeling unattractive.
You see, I grew up believing I wasn’t sexy. Because sexy and a big belly don’t belong to the same category. Because sexy and big thighs are complete opposites. Because sexy will never be that big number on the weighing scale… and I carried this with me for years, because having a body that’s bigger than the usual can never equate to being sexy in the eyes of many.
But on my very first sexy dance class with Teacher Renz of Pole Stars Cebu, right at the moment when our group was called to the dance floor to perform, and upon hearing the familiar first beats of Jeremih’s “Birthday Sex” I was oozing with sexy.
All past inhibitions about the way I looked and all unwanted feelings of feeling ugly went down the drain. I was there, performing every movement with a confidence I never knew I had. Call it foolish, but it was such a joy to see a different side of me. And girl, that replay button on my phone was abused.
I never knew it would only take a two-hour session of this dance class to convince myself that I am a sexy beast, and it made me love myself more.
I signed up for this sexy chair dance class without any expectations of how the session would go. Maybe it was my motivation to try new things this year or a deep desire to explore a side of me that’s usually hidden—whatever caused me to register for this class, I want to pat myself on the back and send a big thank you, because this was life-changing.
Pole Star Cebu’s sexy chair dance class is more than just your typical dance class—it feels less intimidating with an encouraging teacher and classmates, and it’s filled with mini activities that will make you less conscious of the things that usually suppress your sexy side. In fact, after talking to Teacher Renzi briefly, I found out that the class was created to become a form of “escape” for its participants after a long, tiring week. In teaching her sultry moves, Teacher Renzi hopes that everyone would find a place to dance freely. In her words, the class hopes to become “A dance where women can express themselves.”
And indeed, after joining my first class, I felt liberated, empowered, and happy to find a safe space to let go of all my insecurities. I’m not gonna lie, a few hours before the class, I did experience the “newbie” jitters that felt like a trip down memory lane when my first days in school brought both excitement and fear of the unknown. But all these were shattered as the hours went by.
It’s like your usual dance class—a choreography is taught, we’re given a few moments to practice, and it ends with groups performing in front of everyone. But unlike other dance classes I’ve tried, this was less intimidating and more encouraging right from the start. I attribute this friendly environment to how the classes were designed.
Apart from the usual teaching-practicing-performing, Teacher Renzi introduced parts to make dancing and performing in front of strangers less scary. First, the class started with everyone introducing themselves to each other, a good way to break the ice.
Next, after an intense few minutes of stretching, the lights went off, the sensual tunes of Mariah Carey’s “My All” blasted, and we were encouraged to tap our own sensuality by expressing it through our movements, all while our eyes were closed. This was really quite an experience with all of us transforming from being conscious to eventually letting go.
Lastly, dividing us into teams served a different purpose other than mere performance groupings. We were asked to collaborate and work together on a certain part of the song, coming up with a choreography that fit our group’s style. This helped in further creating that supportive vibe, with everyone pitching in their ideas and cheering for each other while learning the steps together. As I said, this really was a safe space to perform and be free, with every classmate becoming a hype woman some of us need to step out of our comfort zones.
Now after joining three sessions, I can definitely declare that this sexy dance class has become one of my favorite things I look forward to.
There’s a certain joy and feeling of liberation in discovering a new side of you, and I’m just fortunate to find a safe space to do so.
In fact, whenever I feel negative thoughts about my body image lurking, I find myself watching videos of myself dancing from our past classes, a reminder to myself of the power I hold as a woman. This class will also remind you that anyone and everyone is definitely sexy.
If you’re looking for a way to get in touch with your sensual side, or if you’re looking for a way to boost your confidence, Pole Star Cebu’s sexy chair dance class with Teacher Renzi might just do the trick. By the end of every lesson, you’ll find yourself feeling empowered with confidence that will help you fall in love with yourself the way you deserve to be loved and appreciated, even on the days you feel otherwise. Plus, it’s a good workout that doesn’t feel like a workout!
To find out more about their dance lessons and schedules, you may check out Pole Star Cebu’s Facebook page and Instagram. They also offer pole dancing classes, belly dancing classes, and flexibility classes.