When people ask whether I have brothers and sisters, I usually say yes, with one older brother, who is a priest; and one younger sister, who is a nun. “Wa’ kay plano mosunod nila?” people often ask, giggling and perplexed.

Laughing at their remarks, I said that as the middle child, I perceive myself as the odd one out. Despite our different careers, I love and respect my siblings, who do the same for me. Sometimes, I would say, “Okay na siguro na sila lang didto kay need sad ma balance ang among situations, haha.“

My family has always been very conservative in its ideas and morals. Despite growing up in a traditional household, I leaned toward being a forward-thinking, independent, and open-minded individual.

Sister’s Sister

Among my siblings, I have fond recollections of my sister, Mia, before she became a nun. She will be 30 in a few months. At the age of 16, she embarked on a journey of faith.

When I was 17, my mother told me that Mia’s purpose might be to become a nun. Because of Mia’s strong personality, my devoutly Catholic mother was at first apprehensive about her choice.

She was an opinionated teenager who disdained wearing skirts and got upset when she was pushed to do so. According to my mother, my sister preferred pants, shorts, and slippers.

Considering that being a nun would require Mia to give up everything she loves, including her favorite shorts and jeans, my mother was apprehensive that it was only a phase. “Skirts are mandatory,” my mom told my sister.

On the other hand, Mia was determined about her decision, and my mother did everything she could to help her. For my part, I was just a quiet teenager wondering how long my sister could put up with the religious way of life.

Mia continued to attend scientific school until her third year. In 2008, she moved to Manila and joined a religious group. She lived in a mission house. (She went there for her fourth year of high school and finished her education with the help of the nuns.)

Our lives have changed, and nothing is the same anymore. We no longer have tiny squabbles or vacation trips to Grandma’s home together. No more sleeping in the backseat of a car on the way home. The house became silent and lonely.

All that remained of the previous memories at home were family photographs on the wall and other photos saved in old albums and frames. After all these years, I recall one thing about her.

I recall a time when my sister and I were dancing to music from the TV program “Click.” We practiced dance moves late at night while our housemaid slept blissfully. It was fun while it lasted. We didn’t argue.

Even though I’ve only seen her on rare occasions since her vocation requires her to remain remote, I still want to reconnect with her and recreate what we had when we were younger. We grew apart and now see life from different perspectives.

Sometimes I feel jealous of other people with strong relationships with their siblings. But I decided to put that feeling aside and be thankful that, even though my sister isn’t here, I’ve been given lifelong friends who I consider sisters.

Living in Two Different Universes

Having a family member who chooses a religious path affects us all differently.

While I have never heard or read any dialogues or discussions on this subject up to this point, I get the impression that I am living in two completely different universes.

There are also the pressures that come with having a sister who is a nun. I must be prim and proper one moment and carefree the next. For example, I alternate between attending serious and wholesome activities and attending entertaining and exciting ones.

Since my sister is a nun, I sometimes feel bad about doing something I like. That is something I am presently battling and resolving. I’m unsure if I should listen to what other people say or just do what makes me happy. I ensure that everything is equal. Balance, as my mother always said, is key.

This unusual arrangement resembles a kind of give-and-take. It’s complex, and I doubt anybody will understand everything immediately.

Since this is a unique arrangement, I only tell people about my sister’s way of life when they ask. Consequently, by the time they find out, most people would ask me whether I intend to follow the path only the chosen one has taken.

I also have a hard time telling new acquaintances that I have a sister who is a nun because I think they won’t want to hang out with me. As a result, I keep it to myself to avoid the awkwardness of the scenario.

Proud Sister

Although I keep my family background private, I am pretty proud to have a nun for a sister. She gives back to the community by encouraging spiritual development and instilling a reverence for God’s Word in others.

I’m pleased with how far she’s come in her vocation. She devoted her life to religion early, when most other teens celebrate their sweet 16. I am in awe of her bravery and dedication to spending the rest of her life in spiritual service.

There is no indication that her spiritual development is slowing down in any way. She isn’t throwing it away. In the same way as any other nun, she must pray for others and fulfill charity responsibilities.

Others may have assumed “sayang” she entered, but my sister never regretted it. She is brimming with happiness now that she has achieved what she has been working on for a long time. She’s now in a good situation.

Whenever someone asks me about my siblings, especially my sister, I always respond: “Yes, I have a sister, and she is a nun, and I am always and ever proud of her.”